Thursday, September 11, 2008

A bottle of comfort

So I'm sitting here with a half bottle of wine at my side, and I don't even stop for a second to think that's an unusual thing. Not that I am taking up drinking to drown my sorrows, but the look of it is not odd to me.

It's like something out of a movie. A grieving mother, sitting there with her bottle of wine as she pours her thoughts out to God knows how many strangers online. I can see it now! wait, I'm actually living it. Fantastic.

September 11th is almost over. It's been a horrible day as everyone in this nation can imagine! For me, it's double the pain, because today I would have been 25wks pregnant. Today is exactly 6wk since Cameron was born and left us to be with Jesus. Today is exactly 9wks since this entire nightmare began. Thursdays are just all kinds of bad for me!
And what do you birthday is on a Thursday. Exactly 2 weeks from Christmas - the day our little boy was to be born. Our birthdays and his due date with always fall on the same day of the week.

I don't know how Christmas will be this year, but I am going to try my hardest to make it wonderful. To do our own special little thing for Cameron and for our family. I don't want this to be ruined...I want it to be a celebration! A celebration of the time I had with Cameron and how he touched so many people's lives and what an impact he had on mine!

Well these are my mini-thoughts as we pass another September 11 -

Me and my bottle are going out on the couch...goodnight.

1 comment:

Erica said...

Thursadys "are all kinds of bad for me too". I'm so sorry for you loss (not that those words mean anything anymore, but I'm not up to creative prose at the moment). Please know that I know how you feel.