Wednesday, August 13, 2008

What do I do with myself?

At this very second my heart is aching. I just keep thinking about my little angel's face. So beautiful, so peaceful. I don't ever want to forget what he looked like. I never will.

I know it's late and I need to go to bed. It's early in the morning and late at night that I usually feel this way. The quietness lets me think too much.

I want to pull out his pictures right this second and study them like an open book. I want to, but I can't and I don't know why. It's just's left me in a funny mood.

Tomorrow will be another day, but tomorrow will also mean we're getting closer to the 2wk mark. 2 weeks since we lost Cameron. God, how time flies.

I still have a scab from the IV while in the hospital. I just noticed it and my mind flooded with memories. I can't begin to describe what the first night w/out my baby was like, and I'm not going to even try at this point.

My mind is obviously ALL over the place right now. I'm going to try a sleeping pill and wander off to bed...

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